Listen When Your Body Speaks

Mar 06

Listen When Your Body Speaks

I submitted an application for a job in September 2015. I took 2 weeks to put my application together as the job had asked for a huge amount of information, including a psychometric assessment (my own cost) and a video submission. I built a cv website in the hopes of standing out as an exceptional candidate as I felt she would be getting 100′s if not over 1000 applications as this job offer had been sent to her whole database. I attended an event she spoke at a cost of R250 and most of my Saturday. I had received an email with a link to complete an assessment after the submission date and had heard nothing else. I knew she had been overseas so left it, put it out of my mind, and started at my new position at the digital agency.

I accepted the offer to interview and had the interview on 07th November. I did this because of the time and effort I had put into my application and would always wonder ‘what if” if I never went. It was a 2hour20minute interview. She seemed fabulous and I was completely mesmerised and in awe of this personality I had admired from a distance. I received a job offer on Monday morning, 09th November at 09h12. I was shocked. My throat immediately closed up, I felt hot and cold at the same time and felt like I was going to be sick. I got my phone, went to the bathroom, my stomach was like water, and then I called Andre. I was so confused and had no idea what to do. He, as usual, could offer nothing of value. I called Cheryl-Anne and she said to take the job, do what makes you happy. If I had listened to my body “being revolting” and revolting against the job offer I would not have listened to either of them. I would have stayed at the agency.

It took me a week to resign. I felt so horribly, terribly guilty. I also felt fearful of their reaction to me resigning 2 weeks after I started at their agency. Gary had a bit of a bad temper but is a digital genius and his brother, Ross, was absolutely fabulous and so calm and peaceful and friendly. I had no idea what to do. I didn’t even think of calling Nicole, who is a spiritual guide. I resigned much to their disappointment. I felt the resentment for 2 weeks and was fearful of doing anything wrong or just being me while I worked out my resignation.

I started my new job 01st December. I was ‘let go’ 22 January. For no reason. 2 days later I received a termination letter stating ‘work performance’ as the reason. I went to see a lawyer and was referred to an Attorney and we decided to go to the CCMA. Again, I let fear control me. I was sick the morning of my lawyers appointment and had horrible diarrhoea on the morning I met with the attorney. We had the CCMA meeting 02 March. “She” lied like a cheap Chinese watch and even though I wanted to go to arbitration, my lawyer advised not to as, in her words, “this woman is a very bad person, very toxic, let it go”. I agreed. Arbitration would only be in 3 months and ALL the dirty laundry would be aired. Mine was real, hers would be fabricated (her proclaiming I received 103 hours of training was just one of her vicious lies). We settled, even though I didn’t get what I wanted.

While working for her my hair fell out in chunks, my heels were so badly cracked they looked like an inner city pavement, my nails were chipped and peeling, I completely lost my appetite, and I wasn’t sleeping well at night. I also started eating chicken and drinking coffee again.

After the CCMA case, and knowing that I would not have to face her again, put up with her verbal abuse day after day, have to sit in useless 6-hour meetings every day while she just talked non-stop for those 6 hours about herself (I have the recordings to prove it…), or have to babysit her stupid, idiotic, overgrown excuse for a neurotic dog, guess what has happened?

My hair has stopped falling out, my heels are as smooth as a baby’s bum, and my nails are stronger and longer than they have been in years. My appetite has started returning, I’m still eating chicken (unfortunately) and I’ve stopped drinking coffee. My stomach is no longer in a state of permanent diarrhea and I’m mostly back to sleeping properly again.

The most important lesson I have learned is that I have to listen to my body. The brain and the ego make a noise but the heart and the body tell the real story.

 

Listen When Your Body Speaks

I submitted an application for a job in September 2015. I took 2 weeks to put my application together as the job had asked for a huge amount of information, including a psychometric assessment (my own cost) and a video submission. I built a cv website in the hopes of standing out as an exceptional candidate as I felt she would be getting 100′s if not over 1000 applications as this job offer had been sent to her whole database. I attended an event she spoke at a cost of R250 and most of my Saturday. I had received an email with a link to complete an assessment after the submission date and had heard nothing else. I knew she had been overseas so left it, put it out of my mind, and started at my new position at the digital agency.

I accepted the offer to interview and had the interview on 07th November. I did this because of the time and effort I had put into my application and would always wonder ‘what if” if I never went. It was a 2hour20minute interview. She seemed fabulous and I was completely mesmerised and in awe of this personality I had admired from a distance. I received a job offer on Monday morning, 09th November at 09h12. I was shocked. My throat immediately closed up, I felt hot and cold at the same time and felt like I was going to be sick. I got my phone, went to the bathroom, my stomach was like water, and then I called Andre. I was so confused and had no idea what to do. He, as usual, could offer nothing of value. I called Cheryl-Anne and she said to take the job, do what makes you happy. If I had listened to my body “being revolting” and revolting against the job offer I would not have listened to either of them. I would have stayed at the agency.

It took me a week to resign. I felt so horribly, terribly guilty. I also felt fearful of their reaction to me resigning 2 weeks after I started at their agency. Gary had a bit of a bad temper but is a digital genius and his brother, Ross, was absolutely fabulous and so calm and peaceful and friendly. I had no idea what to do. I didn’t even think of calling Nicole, who is a spiritual guide. I resigned much to their disappointment. I felt the resentment for 2 weeks and was fearful of doing anything wrong or just being me while I worked out my resignation.

I started my new job 01st December. I was ‘let go’ 22 January. For no reason. 2 days later I received a termination letter stating ‘work performance’ as the reason. I went to see a lawyer and was referred to an Attorney and we decided to go to the CCMA. Again, I let fear control me. I was sick the morning of my lawyers appointment and had horrible diarrhoea on the morning I met with the attorney. We had the CCMA meeting 02 March. “She” lied like a cheap Chinese watch and even though I wanted to go to arbitration, my lawyer advised not to as, in her words, “this woman is a very bad person, very toxic, let it go”. I agreed. Arbitration would only be in 3 months and ALL the dirty laundry would be aired. Mine was real, hers would be fabricated (her proclaiming I received 103 hours of training was just one of her vicious lies). We settled, even though I didn’t get what I wanted.

While working for her my hair fell out in chunks, my heels were so badly cracked they looked like an inner city pavement, my nails were chipped and peeling, I completely lost my appetite, and I wasn’t sleeping well at night. I also started eating chicken and drinking coffee again.

After the CCMA case, and knowing that I would not have to face her again, put up with her verbal abuse day after day, have to sit in useless 6-hour meetings every day while she just talked non-stop for those 6 hours about herself (I have the recordings to prove it…), or have to babysit her stupid, idiotic, overgrown excuse for a neurotic dog, guess what happened?

My hair has stopped falling out, my heels are as smooth as a baby’s bum, and my nails are stronger and longer than they have been in years. My appetite has started returning, unfortunately, I’m still eating chicken and I’ve stopped drinking coffee. My stomach is no longer in a state of permanent diarrhea and I’m mostly back to sleeping properly again.

The most important lesson I have learned is that I have to listen to my body. The brain and the ego make a noise but the heart and the body tell the real story.